The first week after graduation was extremely emotional. No, not because I will never see some of my friends again, but because of other factors.
I don’t recall how I spent my first weekend of summer, but I’m assuming that there was a lot of sleeping involved.
And celebrating. Lots of celebrating and drinking.
Monday is a blur.
Tuesday, my friend Michelle drove her sisters and me to Six Flags. We almost died on the way to the park thanks to some asshole on the freeway. He was driving a red BMW convertible. And he worked at Six Flags…
After we averted disaster, parked our car, and made our way to the entrance, Michelle and her sisters lead me to the Log Jammer ride. I was in the third seat, so as you can imagine, I was completely drenched once we finished. It took me about four hours to fully dry.
Our second ride was Goliath. Early in the morning, when I was lying in bed I thought about riding Goliath. I immediately got out of bed because excitement and anxiety had set in. Nonetheless, it was extremely fun, but not as fun as SUPERMAN: Escape from Krypton. The rush of adrenaline when you experience on that ride… when you’re seated in the front is indescribable. You need to go; it’s my favorite ride.
Other rides: Scream, Colossus, Déjà Vu, Ninja, Roaring Rapids, Tatsu, etc…
After we arrived home, we were told that my sister’s dog was hit and killed by a car. Sadly, I wasn’t surprised but I miss yelling at Doopey. Sigh
Wednesday…
I woke up with the intention to end a relationship that I believed was hurting me.
I gathered the books he had given me and the ones that he let me borrow, and I left my house to catch the bus. I arrived at the train station before him; that’s how I wanted it to be. Soon he came and I told him that I had something to say. He sat down next to me. I told him that I didn’t want to be his girlfriend anymore.
His whole demeanor changed. I gave him the books and he placed them inside his pack. I told him about Doopey’s demise as a way to keep my tears at bay. He then asked me about where we were headed, and to his surprise, I told him that I was going out with friends. He mumbled something about paying for an all day pass, and as I reached into my purse to pay him back, he had already gotten up and left.
Inside, I was completely shattered. I was surprised by how unshaken he was by my decision. He never asked why nor did he try to change my mind. He just accepted it. Like a pussy. I guess not everyone is worth fighting for. Edit: I should have talked to him first before making a decision.
The rest of the day I spent with friends. We ate, shopped, and relaxed. All the meanwhile I thought about what was going to happen next, how I was going to deal with this self-inflicted pain. I’m the type of person who chooses to forget the person by simply eliminating all contact. However, he is dear to me. I’ve known him for over four years. Or, at least I think I know him… He was a good friend before and I didn’t want him to disappear.
He initiated a text. I responded. For the next couple of hours, we exchanged texts.
It still seemed to me that I wasn’t the effort and that I have fallen to the same predicament as before. Nothing is going to change if I don’t do anything, so I have to speak up about what’s bothering me.
And that’s what I did, or tried to do on Thursday. I didn’t want to leave it the way it had; I still like him a lot. We had planned to meet at the station again, but my nephew wasn’t awake by the time I had finished getting ready. I waited for my nephew to awake and planned to drop him off at my sister’s.
Since my nephew woke up late, our meeting was pushed later and gave Alberto time to get more sleep. I decided to go to his house and talk to him there. Unfortunately, it was easier said than done. I lost my voice and only my tears spoke.
Even after I left, I was conflicted. I still am. Edit: I’m not anymore.
